-Charles A Beard
"Hope
Know no fear.
Hope dares to blossom
Even inside the abysmal abyss.
Hope secretly feeds
And strengthens
Promise."
- Sri Chinmoy
"Were it not for hope the heart would break."
-Scottish Proverb
In my many long dark months, several friends were by my side telling me to never give up hope. Though it was hard and at times I wished the struggle would end, I knew that the reward would be worth the effort. I could mention names of those who stood so closely by my side and kept me in their thoughts and prayers, but they already know who they are. I just want to thank them from the very depths of my soul.
As I returned to a peaceful place with sunshine, I still felt an outsider. But, again, my friends told me never give up hope. I smiled and went about my days, still wondering why did I even bother hoping for something. But now I know why.
I never knew why I needed it, but I knew I did. At times I wondered why I even cared. But I held true to that small glimmer of hope that burns eternally. And It has made the world a better place.
OK, so why is Nev in such a deep thoughtful mood? Because I am helping a friend through a rough time in his life. I want to pull him out of the darkness as he did for me. I know that I can't do that. If that was possible, I'm sure he would have pulled me out a long time ago. All I can do is offer words of support and encouragement to him in this hard time for him. I know at times that glimmer of hope seems too hard to see, but it is always there, never lose sight of it.
Which brings me to my coming out into the sun announcement!! Why is Nev so happy!? Well, for one thing, my real life seems to be doing well, my new medication is working so far. And secondly, my second life could not be better. If you had asked me a week ago my thoughts of finding someone who really makes me happy, I would have told you I was barely holding on to hope that I would. But, I did hold on and could not be happier!
So, I told you about Ian, how we met and our first couple of dates together. Well, the continue to be more and more special each day. We spent some private time together in my sky sanctuary and then did some sight-seeing in "Scotland". I really love just going and exploring places with him. We also did some dancing at Tiger's Eye and then just hung out together. Today I left him some flowers to let him know I was thinking of him. I really enjoy his company more and more every day. He bought a couples dance kit and we danced above the clouds with the stars and moon above us. It was the most special time together. He makes my heart beat faster.
So, what does the future hold for Nevie? Well, stay tuned to find out. I really hope it includes Ian. I have never felt more alive than I do with him around me. I knew it was strange to both of us, but we have taken to this new "togetherness" quite well so far. I have never wanted to push anything on him, but it comes so naturally. I feel like I've known him for longer. I know there is so much we both still have to share and I know it will come in time. For now I have my "special friend" title at Grampian Estates. He is the Heart of Grampian... that makes me Grampian's Heart.
Ah, I am the happiest kitty alive!! He is better than the best catnip I can find! I want to keep him forever in my arms. Thank you Ian for making everyday beautiful!
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